Calm Your Tits Retro Slogan Tee

Name: Calm Your Tits Retro Slogan Tee
Brand: MindPop Threads
SKU: 5301049_21593
Price: 29.95 USD
Availability: InStock

$29.95 USD

One Price. Every Size.

Color: Vintage Black

Size: XS

Product variants

Not sure? See size chart

✓ DOMESTIC FREE SHIPPING

✓ GUARANTEED SAFE CHECKOUT

✓ 30-DAY RETURNS ON UNWORN ITEMS

✓ MADE TO ORDER

✓ SHIPS IN 4–7 BUSINESS DAYS

✓ HOLIDAYS +4 BUSINESS DAYS

★★★★★

"Absolutely love this shirt — the fabric is excellent and the print is great. Shipped quickly too." — Katie

★★★★★

"Great design and quality. Definitely recommend this seller." — Sarah

★★★★★

"Love the shirt. Great quality." — Justin

★★★★★

"Great quality, would order again!" — Cynthia

★★★★★

"Bought this for my husband — great fit, and he loves it." — Lynn

★★★★★

"Got this as a Christmas gift — turns out it was her favorite gift!" — Mike

★★★★★

"I LOVE this shirt — the seller kept me up to date on its progress without me even asking." — Callie

★★★★★

"Great shirt. Very satisfied. Thank you." — Juliane

★★★★★

"I was very pleased with my shirt." — Darrick

Product Description

"Calm Your Tits" graphic tee with retro mid-century typography and hot pink sparkle stars, printed on a Bella+Canvas unisex tee, 100% cotton (no poly), true to size, size-inclusive. Made to order, DTG printed.

The phrase someone needed to hear. The shirt that says it for you.

Cream lettering, hot pink sparkle stars, mid-century type that looks like it belongs on a cocktail napkin from 1958 — delivered with the grace of someone who is absolutely done.

"Calm Your Tits" has always been the right call. The mid-century retro typography and pink sparkle accents make it look like a very cheerful, very firm suggestion — the visual equivalent of saying something devastating with a smile. It's not a protest shirt. It's not a manifesto. It's just the most efficient sentence in the English language, dressed up like it belongs on a Vegas marquee.

Why You'll Love It

- Cream off-white retro lettering with hot pink sparkle stars — the typography has the nerve to be charming about it

- Mid-century graphic style that makes 'calm your tits' look like it was always meant to be said this nicely

- The slogan does the heavy lifting so you don't have to — wear it to brunch, wear it to the thing you didn't want to go to, wear it everywhere

Who It's For

For the woman who has given one too many calm, measured responses and is officially out of them. Wears great on its own for a grocery run, a concert, a bad family dinner, or literally any occasion where someone nearby needs a non-verbal heads-up. Also an excellent gift — for the friend who keeps the group chat sane, the sister who has heard it all, the coworker whose face you've seen go very still during a meeting. Year-round, no occasion required, zero explanation needed.

Mood: Unbothered. Sparkling. Completely serious.

Eco-Friendly Clothing

100% COTTON (HEATHER COLORS ARE A BLEND)
WATER BASED VEGAN INKS
FAIR LABOR ASSOCIATION ACCREDITED SUPPLY CHAIN
PRODUCED IN WRAP-CERTIFIED FACILITIES

Materials

• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Guatemala, Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US•

Size Chart

see size chart

Disclaimer: The fabric is slightly sheer and may appear see-through, especially in lighter colors or under certain lighting conditions.

Size guide

	LENGTH (inches)	WIDTH (inches)	CHEST (inches)
XS	27	16 ½	31-34
S	28	18	34-37
M	29	20	38-41
L	30	22	42-45
XL	31	24	46-49
2XL	32	26	50-53
3XL	33	28	54-57
4XL	34	30	58-61
5XL	35	31	62-65

Care

CARE FOR YOUR CLOTHES. CARE FOR THE PLANET.

FOR BEST RESULTS

• Machine-wash cold, inside-out, on gentle cycle with similar colors.
• Use mild detergent. Avoid fabric softeners and bleach.
• Hang-dry or tumble-dry on low.
• If ironing, use a cool iron inside-out. Never iron the print.
• Do not dry clean.

mindpop threads promise

MindPop Threads creates Gen X-inspired graphic apparel featuring retro nostalgia, sarcastic humor, dark wit, pop culture references, and original artwork. From vintage-inspired graphics and music tees to gaming, Halloween, yoga, and everyday rebellion, our designs are made for people who like their comfort with a side of attitude.

Legal / EU Compliance

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Mindpop Threads, Inc. and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards.
For any product safety-related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com
.
You may also write to us at 5900 Balcones, Suite 100, Austin, TX or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.

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